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April 1, 2022

The Importance Of Planning Ahead

By Barry Rudesill

So, I got up this morning, walked the dogs – we have three now, but that’s another story – and started getting ready for my day. In the middle of my morning routine, the power went out! I guess a quarter-inch of ice followed by heavy, wet snow will do that!

I went back upstairs, grabber my winter gear, and walked over to our generator. I turned it on and, a few tugs later, we had power in our house again. Not all of the house, however the switches control the furnace, pumps, the outlets that have a refrigerator or freezer, and the living room lights/outlets which gives us the Internet.

Now I’d like to claim credit for setting up this system...but I didn’t. The previous owner of our house had wired an external power connection for a generator, he set up bypass switches, and he wired specific circuits to those switches. And the first time we lost power here – I think it was for three days – I was wishing for the opportunity to shake his hand!

Some of you may be asking, “Well, what does this have to do with The Trek?” Fair enough; let me share with you what I’m thinking:

In our programs, we tend to be “past focused”; in other words, we deal a lot with past hurts, past mistakes, and past problems. These things still haunt us today and they DO need to be fixed for us to be healthy.

But there is another direction we should also learn to focus on: the future! Now to be fair, we do talk about this in a number of classes – “Grief” comes readily to mind. Today, though, as I spent my time connecting everything that we had prepared “just in case”, it seemed like a good time to do a reminder!

If you’re struggling with Grief, especially if it’s the loss of someone you loved, be sure to plan ahead for birthdays, anniversaries, or other reminders. Figure out what you will do – or won’t do – before the date, that way you’re prepared for the mental and emotional response and you know what to do about it. (Remember, too, that you don’t have to be alone on those dates!)

If you’re struggling with Boundaries, especially if it’s an area where you’ve had trouble holding your boundaries in the past, figure out what you will say ahead of time, how you plan to respond, and how you can make sure that you honor yourself while honoring others. Practice the phrases until they feel comfortable and then, when your boundary is being pushed, you will have the ability to stand.

If you’re struggling with Escape, especially if it’s in the area of addictions – be it alcohol, drugs, pornography, shopping, etc. – plan ahead how to minimize or avoid situations where you are likely to react that way. Maybe it means that you need to leave behind some “friends”, join a support group, or find a friend who will help to hold you accountable.

And there are so many other circumstances we could talk about here. But do you know what they all have in common? These are all things that require preplanning. Unfortunately, most of us – myself included – fail to do the work ahead of time! We think that, somehow, we will be able to just “get it right” in the moment. How well is that working for you? (It doesn’t work so well for me!)

As Winston Churchill reportedly said, “He who fails to plan is planning to fail!”

Today, take a moment and look at your actions and reactions. Are there areas where you could improve? If so, why not take some time and come up with a plan to help you to deal with these in a healthy fashion the next time they occur?

Be safe today, stay warm, and, as always,we hope you enjoy your journey!

- The Trek

April 1, 2022

The Importance Of Planning Ahead

By Barry Rudesill

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